New Year’s Resolutions with a Twist

I would like to propose a new kind of resolution as we begin the new year — resolutions that have none of the guilt that most of our pledges arise from after the weeks of excess during the holiday season. We feel guilty about all the rich food that we have eaten, our lack of exercise and physical activity, all the liquid Christmas cheer that we have imbibed, and all the money that we have spent. Our guilt inspires impassioned vows to exercise regularly, to eat a healthy diet, to detox our bodies, to live within a budget, to pay off our credit cards… to make any number of surface changes that we hope will make us feel better about ourselves.

Guilt-inspired resolutions are doomed to fail. You and I both know this. We start off with great determination and gusto, and before long, our efforts begin to wane and we find ourselves back where we started from. Then we feel even worse about ourselves because we couldn’t sustain changes that we thought we could make from the outside in. The key to lasting change for our happiness and well-being is to initiate change from the inside out.

With this in mind, I would like to propose the following resolutions:

  • Every day, choose to love yourself. Don’t just brush this aside. This is the most important work that you can do to begin to come from an inner space of strength and resilience. For years, I resisted this inner work because I believed it to be self-centred. What I didn’t realize was that I couldn’t truly love another unconditionally or be the loving person that I wanted to be until I could come from a place of love within myself. I couldn’t find my own inner strength and power until I truly loved me and opened into the love that I am. Do the mirror work that Louise L. Hay suggests. Each day, look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I love you.” Look deeply in your own eyes and smile with tenderness and true caring back at YOU. It will feel uncomfortable at first, but persist. You will begin to feel your inner self responding to your affirmations of love. When you look into your own eyes, you will see and feel the response within you. Imagine the year that you will have as you begin to come from an inner space of self-love instead of self-criticism and judgment.
  • Choose to see who you really are. You are not the body that you see in the mirror. You are not the separate individual that your ego would have you believe. You are a beautiful spiritual being, just as I am, just as everyone is. That means that we are all one beyond the illusion of separation created by our bodies. There is no boundary where my energy ends and yours begins. My energy is connected to your energy, and our energy is connected to the energy of all living beings through the incredible matrix of Divine energy. We are all spiritual sisters and brothers — all perfect expressions of the universal Love that is God. Just consider for a moment how empowering this knowledge is! You are not the scared, little individual who is tossed about by the winds of fortune and fate. You, my dear, are powerful beyond measure. You are created as an expression of Divine Love, and there is no power greater than love. Embrace who you really are and step fully into your true identity. You will find the joy, peace, and love that everyone aspires to find.
  • When you recognize and remember who you really are, you can make another choice, which is the third resolution — choose love over fear. Fear and mistrust of others arises from the egoic perception that we are separate and that we have to protect ourselves from attack by others. This belief in separation and the resulting fear that it evokes creates the judgment, hatred, prejudice, and violence that we witness in the world. When we know who we really are as children of God, as spiritual beings created by Divine Light and Love, we can choose differently. God is Love, and as expressions of His Divine Love, we are also love. When we choose to come from the love that we are, we begin to perceive and experience more love in the world. How is this possible? Like attracts like. When you choose to look at the world through lenses of fear, the energy you emit has a low frequency. This frequency attracts negative emotions and experiences, which have like frequencies. When you choose to look at the world through lenses of love, you emit energy of high frequency, which attracts positive emotions and experiences. You can change your experience of the world by choosing love over fear. Imagine the power of this choice to transform your life!

That’s it — three resolutions that begin with inner work and that will empower you to create true and joyful change in your life. When love is your guide for how you see yourself and for how you see others and the world, you will feel good about yourself. You will know your worth, and your light will shine from the inside out for all to see. You will radiate the energy of the love that you are. Namaste, my dears. :))


2 thoughts on “New Year’s Resolutions with a Twist”

  1. Thank you for your article on grieving. A lot has happened in my 59 years of life and for the first time I believe I’m truly learning how to grieve without feeling I’m doing something wrong or its weak. My family taught me early in life to put it behind you and go on. I didn’t realize until recently that my mother and sister are still doing this. My husband of 29 years had an affair and ended up marrying this younger woman. I had to file bankruptcy do to my ex husbands not filing taxes properly. He filed unknown to me and all debt was mine because I had signed the tax returns.
    I married a man that I truly didn’t know right after the divorce and after a year had to leave to get help. I was sick, my family gave me a job cleaning their office building and in time worked hard and got out of the depression. With Gods help! I couldn’t have moved through all of this without my relationship with God and His Word.
    My husband of a year wanted to know if we were going to work this out and I told him I had to get better first. He sent papers and we were divorced.
    I can not really recall too much at that point in my life, still hadn’t grieved properly first divorce.
    Stayed single 6 years, dating once in a while. A man came into my life that charmed his way in. Took him about 4 years but finally I decided I would marry him. Seriously, the biggest mistake I’ve made I truly believe. 2 days before we married my oldest son passed away, overdose.
    I had never heard the term personality disorder but going through grieving for my son, my new husband was and is a narcissist. Truly it’s been one of the hardest and emotional things I’ve gone through. My friends have been such a support for me. They let me talk and cry and just hurt inside.
    My mother just two days ago when I was trying to share with her how I was feeling told me to put it behind me and go on.
    I’m really starting to see how I was brought up and how my not dealing with things is by far not a way to deal with it.
    I’ve separated from my new husband and as I write this, he is on a cruise with two women.
    I have to say, all the things I’ve gone through, am going through and will go through, I do not want to put under a rug and act like I’m all right all the time because I’m not. I’m taking one day at a time, working and healing. God is seeing me through. He’s given me people like you to say, it’s alright to grieve. It’s natural to feel emotional pain and like you said, hit a pillow, cry, whatever helps and then sit back and experience the peace that passes all understanding in Christ Jesus.

    1. Dear Shelley, thank you for writing and sharing your experience. Like you, I grew up in a family where one didn’t speak of grief or of emotional pain that just didn’t go away. Instead, I was expected to put it behind me and soldier on. As you and I have both experienced, that doesn’t deal with the emotional pain. It just pushes it out of the way… until it surfaces again… which it most certainly will. It is important to remember that our families are just telling us what they were conditioned to do; they are just passing on what they learned to do. Allowing pain to surface and to feel it to its depth and in all of its intensity is the only way to release it. When we acknowledge it and allow it to be expressed, we can let it go. When we first allow pain to express itself, we are so scared that it will sweep us away, devour us, finish us… but it doesn’t. It sweeps through us, and we remain as the presence that witnesses its expression. And yes, yes, yes, Shelley, as the pain releases, we open into the exquisite peace that truly passes all understanding, and we know that no matter what happens to us in this life, we are always the witnessing spiritual presence that remains as we release our fears and emotional pain. I send you love and prayers for healing. Linda

Hello :) Please share your comments and related experiences. I look forward to learning and growing with you!

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