Children

In Honour of Fathers Who Choose to Be Dads

I will always remember the wise words of a young girl as she explained the names she used for her step-father and her father. She used Dad to refer to her step-father and Father to refer to her biological father, because “anyone can be a father; not everyone is a real dad.” I thought of her innocent wisdom often during the years in which my own children ached for their father to choose to be a dad and to put them first. I write this letter on behalf of children who yearn for dads they can truly honour on Father’s Day and who put them first every day.

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In Honour of Fathers Who Choose to be Dads

I will always remember the wise words of a young girl as she explained the names she used for her step-father and her father. She used Dad to refer to her step-father and Father to refer to her biological father, because “anyone can be a father; not everyone is a real dad.” I thought of her innocent wisdom often during the years in which my own children ached for their father to choose to be a dad and to put them first. I write this letter on behalf of children who yearn for dads they can truly honour on Father’s Day and who put them first every day.

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Contemplating the Power of My Expectations

I spent time reflecting on the following passage from Chapter 9, Section II, Paragraph 5 of the Text of A Course in Miracles this week:

The message your brother gives you is up to you. What does he say to you? What would you have him say? Your decision about him determines the message you receive.

The message my brother gives me is up to me? My decision about him determines the message I receive? I knew the truth in these words as soon as I read them, and I realized that knowing their truth placed responsibility on me for embodying this truth in my life.

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A Tribute to Motherhood

  I dedicate this post to mothers everywhere — new mothers, experienced mothers, grandmothers and great-grandmothers, those who yearn to be mothers, and those who just naturally mother all living beings in their lives. Motherhood opens wide our hearts, and teaches us about unconditional love… love that truly surpasses all understanding, love that recognizes the beauty of another’s inner light and finds its expression in giving and nurturing. Motherhood strengthens our hearts to withstand the agony of worry and the pain of witnessing our children’s hurt, and not being able to do anything other than hold them and shelter them from the stormy winds of life. Motherhood tempers our hearts with understanding and compassion so that we learn what it is to truly listen without judgement or the need to fix, so that we learn to witness and guide our children’s journeys to finding who they are. Motherhood fortifies our […]

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Layers of Self-Judgement Exposed

The process of self-awareness — uncovering and correcting the limiting beliefs and self-judgements that trip us up — has been compared to “peeling an onion.” We uncover scars and false perceptions layer by layer, and as we pull back each layer, we discover yet another layer to be examined, understood, healed, and peeled back. Sometimes I wonder how I created so many layers of self-judgement and whether I will ever arrive at my “inner onion,” divested of all the layers that hold me back. Last weekend was a holiday weekend in Canada — Thanksgiving — a time for families to gather together and to appreciate one another and all the blessings in their lives. When I lived the classic portrayal of the happy, loving family, I anticipated family holidays with relish and spent a great deal of time planning and preparing for them. It was a time to bask in the image of […]

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My Prayer for Beginning a New School Year

As I contemplate the beginning of a new school year, I am filled with excitement about the community of learning and growing and caring that I will build with my students. I am also filled with acute awareness of the powerful influence we will have on one another. And so I pray from the deepest part of me: Dear God, I pray that each day… each hour… each moment… I am open to, and guided by, Your Love so that I may recognize and nurture the beautiful light that shines within each of my students. Help me to see who they truly are beneath any exterior defences they have erected, and guide me to help each of them see and embrace their own truth. I pray that every moment my students spend with me in our classroom is about learning and growing and moving ever closer to the people they are meant to become. I pray […]

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Help Our Children Discover Life Beyond Entitlement

O child of my heart, I wanted to give you everything… … lay the world at your feet …. make all your wishes come true … create a fairy tale existence of happily ever after. All for you, Child of my heart.   O child of my dreams, I wanted to give you everything I imagined I didn’t have growing up… … recognition of how special and worthy you are … opportunities to have and experience everything other kids got to enjoy … rewards for doing your best… and sometimes, not even your best. Every first… and second and third… every little thing… had to be recorded and displayed in honour of you and your life… … albums and digital folders and walls of photos … posts on social media seeking affirmation of all that I see in you. You were the star of everything you did. I made the world […]

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Relationships Provide Our Greatest Teachers: Part 3 — Our Children

As I held you in my arms for the first time      and marveled at your tiny perfection,           how was I to know the magnitude of what you would teach me? As I felt my heart fill and open wide,      how was I to imagine what you would teach me            about the depth and breadth of unconditional love? As I felt the enormity of your complete dependence on me,      how was I to know that your trust and belief            would inspire me to become ever more of whom I am meant to be? How was I to know       that as your parent,           you would be my teacher? As I reflect on the lessons I have learned from my relationships, I realize that my […]

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