How Does True Forgiveness Feel?
Those of you who have followed my blog for a while know that I have struggled to practise forgiveness in my life. At first, it was a way for me to release emotional baggage that was weighing me down and keeping me stuck in negativity and blame. Then, as I opened into awareness of my spiritual identity, it became vitally important to me to truly forgive those whom I believed had hurt me and to be able to love them unconditionally. I wanted to be able to think of them and feel only love – no blame, no judgment, no hurt – only love. Each time, I thought that I had forgiven, events occurred to show me that even though my intent was to forgive, I hadn’t reached a state of true forgiveness.
Do We Create Our Own Emotional Pain?
Have you believed that you experienced hurt because of the actions and words of another? Have you experienced fear that you will be hurt again? Have you erected inner walls to protect yourself from further betrayal and emotional pain? If you are like me, you can answer a resounding yes to each of these questions. I am beginning to realize that because I believed that others had the power to hurt me, I created circumstances in which I experienced recurring emotional pain.
Nothing Can Harm the “I Am” That Is Our True Identity
A powerful realization arose within me this week: nothing can hurt my true identity as the spiritual being that I am. Indeed, nothing has ever hurt the “I am” that I am. When I act from the belief that I have been hurt or harmed in any way, I am identifying with ego – with the individual identity I have created in which I perceive myself as separate from you and from everyone else.
My Call to Release My Inner Critic
Are you hard on yourself? Are you your own worst critic? I certainly have been my whole life, and it seems that my body is sending me a strong message that constant self-criticism has not only been hard on my self-esteem; it has taken a toll on my physical health.
Another Lesson Presents Itself in My Life
In spite of the spiritual growth and deepening awareness I share with you week after week, it was interesting to observe how quickly I fell into the clutches of fear when I received unexpected news last night. In previous posts, I have shared with you my experiences with swollen joints and the message to forgive and release past emotional pain that I believed my body was telling me. Swollen, painful joints have continued to challenge me, and I have kept working on forgiveness, innately knowing that suppressed pain and anger were causing the inflammation in my joints. Yesterday, I received a call from my doctor to see her after school regarding test results. Within the space of four words, my day turned upside-down, and the light-hearted, open me began to constrict and tighten inside. “You had rheumatoid arthritis.” The laughter and easy conversation stopped, as images of worst-case scenarios flooded my […]
Unconditional Love and Forgiveness
I often use stream-of-consciousness writing to find illumination when I am experiencing internal struggle. I want to share the wisdom that came through in my writing today.
Dear Beloved, talk to me about unconditional love and forgiveness.
The Peace Test
How can you be sure that you are going the right way in life? None of wants to commit to a path and then discover that we made the wrong decision. We all want to feel certain about the steps we decide to take or the way in which we are going. There is one sure way that we can know for sure. It is the peace test, and it comes from Chapter 14, XI, 5:2 in A Course in Miracles: “If you are wholly free of fear of any kind, and if all those who meet or even think of you share in your perfect peace, then you can be sure that you have learned God’s lesson, and not your own.”
Learning to Honour the Process of Healing
When old pain surfaces and its raw ache tears at your heart as if you were immersed in it all over again, do you wonder if you will ever be free of it? Do you question whether you will ever be completely healed? Do you struggle with forgiving those who caused this pain? Do you judge yourself for not being able to release these grievances to the past where they belong?
“A-HA” Moment One — Gaining Insight into the Process of Forgiveness
I “got”… I mean, I really “got“… two incredible understandings during the past week that I want to share with you! I have read these teachings before, but it was this week that their truth resonated within my being and I was able to embrace them beyond my prior surface understanding of the words used to express them. I will share the first “A-ha” moment with you in this post and the second one in the post to follow. The first one happened when I pulled my copy of Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life from my bookshelf. I often refer to Louise’s list of “dis-eases” and probable causes, but this time, I felt compelled to begin reading her book again from the beginning. As you know, I have been working on forgiveness and being able to completely release pain and grievances from my past experiences. When hurt and […]
Delving Deeper into Forgiveness
Soaring high on a radiant crest of inner joy and well-being, Feeling exhilarating freedom as I open into my true identity… … as a Child of God… … a perfect expression of His creative power and Love… … and connected through Spirit to all of Creation… Wanting this ride to continue forever, this wondrous height to carry me always, but I am dashed onto the unyielding rocks of my past, and left splayed and raw and oozing… … pain I thought I had healed, … tears I thought I had shed, … anger I tried to ignore, … and judgement I tried to hide. What message can I find in this pain? What lesson is there in this experience for me to learn? I thought I had forgiven my ex-husband and his wife for the pain […]