Tag: personal growth
Can the Season of Winter Guide Our Inner Growth?
With the first significant snowfalls over the past week, it seems there’s no getting around it. Winter is here to stay in my part of the world… for several months. As children and youth celebrate the opportunity to play in fresh snow and to get out on snowmobiles, I mentally brace myself for the long months of freezing temperatures, windchill, and barren landscapes. I resign myself to going to work in the dark and coming home in the dark, and joking about feeling like a mole. But, is there another way to look at winter? Does it have to be a season to which we resign ourselves? Is it possible that winter can also be our teacher? Can we gain wisdom and understanding through observation and contemplation instead of perceiving it through jaded eyes? Winter is a time when much of the natural world lies dormant here… a time when seemingly nothing happens. Beneath a […]
I just want to say a huge and heartfelt thank you to the thousands of people who have subscribed to my blog posts. I wrestled with writing about my experiences and what I had learned from them for a long time before I made my first post public. Should I reveal myself so publicly? Would anyone want to read about my experiences? Beneath my self-doubts, I felt a continual internal pull toward doing the very thing I kept sidestepping. Finally, with a deep breath and a fervent hope that I could help even one other person, I began writing. Every single day, more of you subscribe to my posts, and I am humbled by this continuing process… truly humbled. I feel a great sense of obligation to all of you to continue to write about what I am learning and realizing with as much insight, integrity, and truth as I can. The one thing […]
Doing Things the Hard Way (plus podcast)
My students frequently laugh and joke with me, “Ms. B, you always do things the hard way!” I have to agree with them because if there is a hard way to do something, I will find it. Often, they will ask me if I have thought of doing something another way… an easier way… and I always have to laugh and admit that I hadn’t… until they suggested it. Then, of course, that easier way seems obvious, and I wonder why I didn’t think of it before. This classroom anecdote connects directly to my life, which has been characterized by actions and choices that have frequently taken me on more difficult pathways. The result has been a lot of bumps and bruises, frustrations and heartbreaks, and setbacks and failures. However, the hidden treasure beneath all that emotional pain has been my inner growth. Because of my seeming predisposition to do things the hard way, I have gained […]
Sweeping Away the Debris of the Past (including Podcast)
Have you noticed that just when you think you are making solid forward progress in terms of your personal growth and well-being that you seem to falter, spin your wheels, and even move backward for a time? Just when it seems that you have internalized the positive self-talk and you are stepping into your inner strength and power, the old tapes start playing the familiar refrain of self-doubt and you feel yourself losing your positive momentum. Uncertainty arises, old fears resurface, and you question the progress you thought you were making. I have been considering this over the past few days as I have experienced yet another “spinning of my wheels.” When we experience the same old doubts and fears that we have struggled with for years, I suggest that it is quite normal to question whether real growth has taken place. From a close vantage point, it might seem […]
Letting Go and Flying Free (podcast)
Forgiveness is the key to your healing and freedom from the hurts of the past. I invite you to listen as I share my blog post, Letting Go and Flying Free. My prayer is that you will find healing through forgiveness as I did.
Layers of Self-Judgement Exposed
The process of self-awareness — uncovering and correcting the limiting beliefs and self-judgements that trip us up — has been compared to “peeling an onion.” We uncover scars and false perceptions layer by layer, and as we pull back each layer, we discover yet another layer to be examined, understood, healed, and peeled back. Sometimes I wonder how I created so many layers of self-judgement and whether I will ever arrive at my “inner onion,” divested of all the layers that hold me back. Last weekend was a holiday weekend in Canada — Thanksgiving — a time for families to gather together and to appreciate one another and all the blessings in their lives. When I lived the classic portrayal of the happy, loving family, I anticipated family holidays with relish and spent a great deal of time planning and preparing for them. It was a time to bask in the image of […]
In Recognition and Celebration of Beginnings
Have you ever stopped to think about the power of beginnings in your life? As I look back on my life, there have been many beginnings… the beginning of life as an adult and then as a teacher, the beginning of life as a wife and then as a mother, the beginning of life as a single parent, the beginning of life as an individual standing strong in her own worth and light… and I realize that the list is endless. Within each beginning that stands as a major turning point in my life, there are a multitude of other beginnings. Each beginning holds within it moments defined by tiny beginnings that build to create real change and learning in our lives. Each tiny beginning is the first time we make a step that is unfamiliar to us, that takes courage, and that, in many cases, somehow rises from a tiny seed of strength […]
Learning to Set Boundaries
For much of my life, I allowed other people to run over me. When someone asked me to do something, even if I didn’t have the time or desire to do it, I acquiesced and did whatever was asked of me. I gave myself stern talks about learning to say no and standing up for myself. I watched other people say no without the world crashing in around them, and I told myself that I could do it too. I knew the cost of not being able to say no. I knew the sinking feeling in my stomach after I said yes, and I confronted the reality of taking on something I didn’t want to do or that I didn’t have time to do. I would give myself a mental grab by the shoulders, take a deep breath, and find a way to do the thing I had felt compelled […]
The New “F” Word — Forgiveness
It seems to me that society needs a new “F” word. Instead of the anger, frustration, judgment, and hatred inherent in expressions of “F- you!” or “F- them” or “F- that,” consider the feeling of love and understanding expressed in “I forgive you.” Our world needs a whole lot more love and understanding… and a whole lot less of the emotions that underpin the other “F” word. What does it mean to forgive? Early in my journey of self-growth, I came to the understanding that forgiveness allowed me to go on without the heavy load of bitterness and anger weighing me down. Forgiveness allowed me to move on without dragging the past with me. As I study the Course in Miracles, I am coming to understand forgiveness in another way… a way that I believe to be much more loving than my earlier understanding, which was much more “me” oriented. Forgiving another means understanding […]
Should You Stay or Should You Grow?
Do you find yourself in a situation in which you are torn about what to do? You vacillate. One minute you think you know that you have to move forward. The next, you are drawn back to what is known. You aren’t happy or fulfilled in where you are or what you are doing. You are filled with a sense of yearning for something that has no clear definition but beckons in your awareness. You know where you are. There is a sense of comfort in what is known, but you know it is not all that you desire. You can’t give it words, but something beckons from within… a sense of more that you are meant to do. You are faced with a decision: should you stay or should you grow? Always, always choose growth. I want to share with you my experience of trying to “stuff” that yearning […]