Tag: spiritual being

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Forgiveness Is More Than a One-Shot Deal

How many times do we need to forgive before there are no more layers of hurt and betrayal to peel back? I can’t give you a definitive answer. It seems trite to say as many times as you need to forgive, but it is true. I have been working on forgiving those with whom I have experienced the greatest hurts for years now, and I’m still not there. I still haven’t reached a place where there is nothing left to forgive… where I can say with complete truth that I hold nothing but love in my heart for them. If I told you that all I ever feel is love when I think of these people, I would be lying to you and to myself. I can tell you that there are times when I genuinely feel compassion, understanding, and love for them, but then when I least expect it… more […]

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Masquerade of Life (includes podcast)

Halloween isn’t the only day that many people wear masks and costumes. How many of us wear masks every day and pretend to be someone we aren’t in order to feel like we belong? How many of us are truly our authentic selves? I invite you to reflect on these questions: Have you added your own version of gossip about someone because everyone else was telling the latest and greatest news about other people and you wanted to feel included? Have you laughed at a joke that belittled a group of people or a gender because everyone else was laughing or because the joke-teller thought it was hilarious? Have you pretended that someone’s words didn’t hit hard and hurt deeply in order to play it cool? Have you pretended to be what you imagined someone else wanted so that they would like you and want to be your friend or partner? Have you subjected yourself […]

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You Are More Than Enough

After years of working on my self-worth and learning to embrace my inner strength, why do I still struggle with going out to social functions on my own? I am worthy in and of myself, right? I am a strong, independent woman, right? Then, why did I agonize about going to a staff function for weeks? Why did I have to push myself to go? It has nothing to do with the people I work with. They are warm, wonderful people. The sticking point for me was that everyone would be bringing their partners, and I would go alone. I enjoy the freedom of being my own person and being able to make my own decisions, but I shrink in the face of couples-dominated situations. Why does all my inner growth and self-confidence shrivel and disappear? Why do tears sneak up and take me by surprise when I try to talk about this […]

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Do You Feel Like You Don’t Belong?

Do you feel like you are on the outside looking in? Does it seem like everyone else finds their place within the ebb and flow of life, but you just can’t seem to find yours? Do you yearn to find a place where it feels that you fit, but it seems that belonging is a state for everyone else but you? After years of feeling this way, I have come to two realizations which I share with you in the hope that either one or both can be of some assistance and reassurance to you. We feel like we don’t belong when we search for validation of our worth from others and we don’t get it. We want to feel like we are “somebody,” and we look to others to make us feel valued. We try so hard to feel acceptance and recognition of our worth from others. We try to […]

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Hatred Will Never Bring Peace

We hate, and often, we don’t even question or understand why. Hatred is passed down from generation to generation. The facts that fueled the hatred are unquestionable. Yes, atrocities have been committed. Yes, people have misused power over other groups. Yes, lives have been lost, people have suffered, and hearts still cry out in pain because of loss and injustice. But, we will never achieve peace through hate. Peace will only be achieved through love. We must leave the past in the past and start anew with a conscious choice to join hands in love and brotherhood. Holding onto the past only perpetuates separation and division. We pass our hatreds and prejudices to our children, and these negative forces continue to motivate attack and conflict throughout the world. We cannot focus on the wrongs of the past in order to move forward as a global community. The only way forward is through forgiveness. We must forgive the past […]

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Where Do You Find Your Worth?

Are you searching for that special someone who will complete you? Do you look out at the world and believe that a partner will make you feel a sense of belonging? Do you think that being in a relationship will make you feel worthy? Your worth is not in a relationship. Your worth is in YOU. You are intrinsically worthy because you are a child of God. Are you striving for a certain position or the promotion that will validate your worth? Do you imagine the day when you will have a title that will proclaim your worth to the world? Or, are you frustrated and unhappy in the work that you do because you believe your worth is not recognized? Your worth is not in the work you do nor the positions you hold. Your worth is in YOU. You are intrinsically worthy because, at your essence, you are a Divine expression of God. Do […]

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We Are Not Our Bodies

When we look at one another as bodies, we create separation. It seems fairly obvious, doesn’t it? I look different from  you, and you look different from the next person. We all look different. Therefore, we must be different, right? Wrong. This is where humanity stalls and sets up walls that create division between people. Seeing one another as different is a choice that we make. I didn’t realize that I had a choice for a good part of my life. I had been conditioned to see myself as an individual in a world of billions of other individuals. I learned at an early age that it would take hard work, effort, and perseverance to achieve success in this world. Achieving success would mean attaining what I wanted through competition. I had to work harder and be better than the others who wanted the positions that I sought. Reaching my goals would mean that […]

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The New “F” Word — Forgiveness

It seems to me that society needs a new “F” word. Instead of the anger, frustration, judgment, and hatred inherent in expressions of  “F- you!” or “F- them” or “F- that,” consider the feeling of love and understanding expressed in “I forgive you.” Our world needs a whole lot more love and understanding… and a whole lot less of the emotions that underpin the other “F” word. What does it mean to forgive? Early in my journey of self-growth, I came to the understanding that forgiveness allowed me to go on without the heavy load of bitterness and anger weighing me down. Forgiveness allowed me to move on without dragging the past with me. As I study the Course in Miracles, I am coming to understand forgiveness in another way… a way that I believe to be much more loving than my earlier understanding, which was much more “me” oriented. Forgiving another means understanding […]

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Love Isn’t a Feeling

On this beautiful Sunday morning, I savour the brilliant green of newly opened leaves. I breathe in the heady perfume of the lilac blossoms and smile at the sweetness of the birdsong. I thrill at the warmth of the sun’s kiss on my skin. Witnessing the beauty of God’s creation that surrounds me, I am moved to write about love. I have come to understand that love is not a word or a feeling. It is a way of being… it is being an expression of God. Love is living from a holy space within each of us — a space through which God’s eternal love is experienced and expressed in this world. Love is opening ourselves up to what is always here for us — even when we lose our way and feel completely lost and alone — and that is God’s Love. When we recognize who we are as God’s children […]

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All That You Seek Is Within You

It seems to me that everyone is searching… for  the perfect job, the perfect partner, the perfect home, the perfect look, the perfect vehicle, the perfect holiday, the perfect deal.. and the list goes on. One only needs to take note of people’s actions and comments over a short period of time to observe this endless quest. Just stand back and observe people in a shopping mall. Listen to people’s conversations over a meal or at coffee. Watch the media messages that bombard us every day. The underlying belief is that these external markers of success will make us happy. Hmmmm… questionable logic seems to be at work here. “When I have/get [insert wish here], I will be happy.” When did having or getting anything ever result in lasting happiness? Might you experience happiness in the attainment of something? Of course. You might experience excitement, a surge of joy, delight, or even a […]

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